Dating and Violence Prevention

Adolescents need to understand that breaking up in dating relationships is a normal, transitional stage. Breaking up should not include violence and does not need to result in feelings of failure or rejection. This one-hour lesson helps high school students identify what they expect in dating relationships and positive ways to end a dating relationship. The session uses simple materials, e.g., blank transparencies, marking pens.

To begin, groups of girls and boys examine gender stereotypes by brainstorming and recording terms that describe the opposite sex, then listing qualities they look for in someone they would date. The combined class discusses the lists to explore factors that are important in relationships and realistic expectations for dates. Next, small groups share how they would like to be treated when a dating relationship ends and describe real experiences. A teacher-led class discussion compares and contrasts desired and actual breaking up experiences. The teacher stresses not letting feelings trigger violent actions and reinforces positive actions such as being honest, not blaming and accepting that many will grieve for a time after breaking up.

The third part involves establishing a code of conduct for dating. Students anonymously submit a list of three dating behavior “rules” and two questions about breaking off relationships. The teacher compiles their “rules” into a master code of conduct and reinforces responsibility, respect and communications. The class answers the questions which the teacher reads aloud. The session concludes with a scenario to which students apply learning and their dating code of conduct.

(McNab W and Henry L. Am J Health Educ 2004;35(6):363-365.)

Comment: This applies the principles of violence prevention with a topic in which most students are highly interested. The school counselor may be helpful with large classes for small group work and for students who need individual follow up. —J.O.